Build Your CABIN {The Grove – Staying}

As our friends are building their RAFT for leaving well, what do we “stayers” build?

How about building your CABIN?

Count the Cost. Again. Remind yourself of the call and purpose that first brought you here. Remember how worthy He is. Rededicate all your being to the trustworthy One who is asking you to stay.

Acknowledge the losses as you wave goodbye to the departing. Losses of camaraderie, collaborating, co-laboring. The friend who gets your um, interesting humor. The colleague who sharpens and inspires you. Acknowledge the impact of layers upon layers of accumulated goodbyes. Then cozy up to the Comforter and allow Him to wrap your teary-eyed soul in His healing peace.

Bless those who are leaving. Don’t be like the older brother who stayed, begrudging blessings the younger received. (Luke 15) You won’t want to regret sulking in your room alone when you could be celebrating and affirming friends with a grateful heart.  Express your belief in the futures of those who are leaving. Pray blessings over them, hug them real tight and wish them well.

Invest in your community. It can seem like those who are leaving have all the best adventures. But look around. There are opportunities and relationships that only the “stayers” get to experience – and they are waiting for you because you stayed. Find the treasures hidden in the deep places. Enjoy the vista reserved for those who stayed on this particular trail just a little longer.

Nest. Make your home your home. Buy a plant. Spend a little extra on the comfortable pillow. Brighten up your place with floral curtains or striped rugs or funky lamps or abundant bookshelves – whatever says, “This is where I dwell. This is my cabin!”

Build your CABIN, sister. And stay a good long while.

We want to hear about your CABIN. What are your thoughts on staying?


This is what we call The Grove.  It’s where we all gather to share our thoughts, our words, and our art on our weekly prompt.  So join us in the comments.  Show us your art work by adding an image. And link up your own blog posts on this week’s prompt.  Click here for details and instructions.


  1. Valerie Browne May 28, 2015

    Enjoy the vista reserved for those who stayed on this particular trail just a little longer.

    What a beautiful word picture!!!

    1. Patty Stallings May 28, 2015

      So true, right?  Some things we don’t see until we take a few more steps in the same direction.

  2. Sarah May 28, 2015

    Thank you for this beautifully written and timely piece.  June is a tough month of good-byes, and after 11 years of staying, I needed this encouragement and vision for staying.

    1. Patty Stallings May 28, 2015

      Sarah, may your heart be encouraged by His love and sustained by His grace as you say goodbye.

  3. Beth Everett May 28, 2015

    Love this, Patty.

    1. Patty Stallings May 28, 2015

      Thank you, sweet Beth!

  4. Grace L May 28, 2015

    We are heading in to our 10th year in our city and have seen many rewards for staying. I agree with “invest in your community” and “nest – make your home a home”. Both of these have made a huge difference for us as we persevere and remember the call that brought us here in the first place. We prefer to stay much more than the idea of moving on.

    1. Patty Stallings May 29, 2015

      Grace, thank you for staying!  May you enjoy the fruit of perseverance!

  5. Courtney May 29, 2015

    Thanks Patty, I needed this today. We live in Kathmandu, and while some friends are leaving in the wake of the earthquakes, we are among those who are staying.  Thanks for your sweet advice – although the nesting part is complicated when each aftershock feels like our house is trying to eat us alive!

    1. Patty Stallings May 29, 2015

      Courtney, your staying in the midst of the unknowns of shaky ground is admirable!  May you feel the Presence of the Unshakable One!

  6. M'Lynn May 29, 2015

    This is so great! We hear so much about those RAFTs…now we can build our CABINs!!! Thanks for this, Patty!

    1. Patty Stallings May 29, 2015

      Thanks, M’Lynn.  We can’t let those leaving be the only builders in the family!  Love and grace to you!

  7. Lydia May 29, 2015

    Thank you for the encouragement! Especially the one about nesting. My apartment was decorated by the last people who lived here and it’s just not me. After adding lots of plants, it feels more like home, but I really need to take the time to put up pictures and make the little changes that will make it my nest. It’s worth the time.

    1. Patty Stallings May 30, 2015

      Hi Lydia.  It is worth the time when you consider how it may help you stay longer.  It’s not just about comfort and familiarity – it’s about sustainability and the long view.  Happy decorating!

  8. Esteci May 30, 2015

    I’m so inspired and helped by the recent posts on staying. Thank you. I’m going to remember this CABIN metaphor/acrostic for a long time.


    1. Patty Stallings May 30, 2015

      Esteci, I’m so glad.  May your CABIN be full of His presence and joy!

  9. MaDonna May 30, 2015

    Thanks Patty! I love this! It’s nice to have something tangible and easy to remember for those that do stay.

    1. Patty Stallings May 30, 2015

      We can’t let those who are leaving have all the building fun!  May you be blessed with His goodness today, MaDonna!

  10. Kelly May 31, 2015

    Perfect. This is our second term- but it’s four years instead of two- so this is our first real staying summer! Thank you for permission to grieve the losses, and invest in those here.

    1. Patty Stallings June 1, 2015

      Blessings to you, Kelly, as you stay.  I hope your summer is fruitful and joyful!

  11. Jennifer May 31, 2015

    Staying… not as a passive act by not leaving, but in making the choice to build our CABIN and seek to “stay well” in just the same way as we talk of “leaving well” is something pulled together and summed up so well here. I took one look at it and recognized a summary of much that I have walked through and been challenged by over the last few months as I come to the end of my 6th year in this city, and recognize the impact of staying while others one at a time keep leaving, the impact I have felt in what I do now finally recognize as the “bad leaving” of a friend, and the opportunities which the choice to stay have just begun to open up. I could probably all to easily write a chapter about each of the points you raised but I simply want to thank you for the clarity with which you have expressed them here, and for the wisdom expressed within them.  Maybe one of these days I will get the opportunity to sit down and talk to you over a coffee. May all of us who stay at this time rather than leave find the courage to build our CABINS and stay well.

    1. Patty Stallings June 1, 2015

      Hi Jennifer.  I agree that staying is far more than “not leaving” and deserves some intentionality.  May your CABIN be full of His grace and kindness!

  12. Ellie June 4, 2015

    Hi Patti, I didn´t get to posting thanks last week but THANKS! So good to be encouraged in our need to: “Nest. Make your home your home. Buy a plant. Spend a little extra on the comfortable pillow. Brighten up your place with floral curtains or striped rugs or funky lamps or abundant bookshelves – whatever says, “This is where I dwell. This is my cabin!””

    When I look around our living room now I really like it because it´s full of wooden furniture and things which say “beauty and peace” to me (when I´ve tidied up the toys!) but there are various other areas of the house that need some work and loving attention. Thanks for the permission to nest! You´re right, we should see it as investing; enabling us to stay longer. Amen.

    1. Patty Stallings June 4, 2015

      Hi Ellie.  After being here for a few years and living with the second hand “goodies” left by our predecessor, I met a new friend who immediately painted her walls, had beautiful throw pillows made, bought a comfortable bed, and filled her home with flowering plants.  She told me she was in it for the long haul and this was going to be her home.  That shifted something in me, giving me permission to make my home a place our family enjoyed.  It is about investing in sustainability!

      May your endeavors to make the rest of your home a place of beauty and peace bring you joy and life! Blessings!

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