When I was praying about my word for 2024, the word “restore” kept coming to mind. I laughed a little to myself because, as I played with the word in my mind, it happened to rhyme.
Restore 2024
I wrote it in my journal and decided it was the word, even if it rhymed.
I’ve been in a long season of restoration.
Restoring health, joy, hope, strength, and peace.
Restoring my love for reading and writing.
Restoring my ability to rest and sleep, cry, and play.
Restoring capacity for things that I love.
The word “restore” is more than just a word to remember. The word in its full meaning has become a daily practice, a conscious effort, a work of self-care.
So many things had been allowed to slide in the busyness, craziness, and hurriedness of overseas life, transitioning back to life in America, and launching three adult TCKs. Little things and big things alike had been pushed down, stuffed, and ignored until all the alarm bells in my body were going off at the same time.
For me, recognizing the alarms was a huge part of the story. Then, knowing the alarms were going off meant getting help. Getting help meant acknowledging how much the hurt, pain, struggle, and brokenness had piled up over the years—naming, feeling, seeing, understanding, and healing all the areas of life that were now screaming for attention. Once I started receiving help, restoration meant having the stories heard, held, and validated in safe, loving ways.
The whole process can be daunting and feel overwhelming and scary because it means you have to be 100% honest with yourself about your current condition. You have to be fully committed to the truth of where you are, how you got there, and what might need to happen to find healthy ground again.
Restoration generally means that something has been broken and needs repair. It needs the full attention of someone who knows what they’re doing and how to help without causing more damage. It means tending and nursing and caring.
For that kind of restoration, you need a team.
I’ve begun referencing this in my life as my healing team.
Who is on the team?
This can be different from person to person, but I would begin with a counselor or a coach. They can work together on your team, or a coach can do the more day-to-day work while a counselor does the deeper, healing work. Either way, these two helpers are key to figuring out what is broken, why it’s broken, and what needs to be done to start the restoration process.
You might get creative depending on your circumstances. You could need a physical therapist, a pilates instructor, or a chiropractor. You might want to see a functional practitioner to help you with supplements and a healthy diet. You might reach out to your doctor in case a medication is recommended or another resource is needed.
Your team is also right here, at Velvet Ashes. A community of like-minded women that you can reach out to and know they’ll completely understand. It could be a group Zoom class about something you are specifically struggling with in this season.
Your team will need to include safe friends and family who will hold the stories with you and encourage you in safety and healing.
A healing team is your close circle, the ones who are invested with you on the journey of restoration.
How do you find this team?
This part can be tricky, depending on where you are in the world. You might want to reach out to your member care for ideas. Maybe you are in a city with an art class or a book club. You could reach out to a coach to help you brainstorm possibilities in your context. Finding your healing team members could be difficult, but it is one of those things that is worth every effort.
In this day of technology, YouTube videos and podcasts can be part of your team. Keynote speakers and authors sharing about grief, health, relationships, marriage, parenting, self-care, and faith can be an invaluable help when you need to soak up truth for the restoration journey.
What’s next?
Now that you know who could be on your team and have an idea how to find them, you have to do the actual work of building your team. That means scheduling an appointment with a coach or a counselor. This took me months. I wrote, rewrote, deleted, rewrote again . . . for a long time before I actually hit send on the email to a counselor.
You might have something sitting in your inbox right now. Go send it.
The first time reaching out for help can be so difficult, but once you do, you’ve started the process of building your healing team.
Next, email a friend. Call your mom. Let a team member in on your struggle.
You can know who needs to be on your team and even find your team, but then fail to take the action that actually puts the team into place for you.
Restoration requires this team.
An extra note about your healing team
Restoration could take some reevaluating of your current team. Is there someone who might not be as safe or trustworthy as you thought? Do you have a coach or counselor that isn’t helping you or understanding your situation? Do you have a doctor that isn’t hearing or listening? Reevaluate and don’t be afraid to make changes.
Healing and restoration happen in connection, trust, and safety. You cannot heal without these key elements.
Also note, you are on this team!
It might seem silly to add this in, but you are on your team.
You are an advocate, helper, encourager, and doer in your own healing.
You set the tone for the day.
You take the next steps of healing.
You allow refreshing, renewal, and restoration to take place.
You choose healthy practices for your body.
You help or harm the process.
Instead of letting that put pressure on you, take a deep breath and remember that you are your very best resource. Why? Because you have the ability to walk in close relationship with Jesus, the mender, helper, creator, and healer of your soul.
Regardless of the rest of your team, Jesus is present with you in the healing process, every minute of the day. He is gracious, kind, and patient as you slowly move forward in faith. He is loving and forgiving as you process events, actions, feelings, and emotions. He is protecting, covering, and guiding through it all.
As I was writing and preparing for this post, Psalm 51 came up in my daily Bible reading plan—well-known verses, but also simple, faithful reminders that restoration is part of God’s plan for our lives. In Psalm 51:10 David prayed, “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me” (ESV). Verse 12 goes on to say, “Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.”
Friends, so often, these times of restoration come after an incredibly difficult season. You might still be in the season of hard things. You might feel stuck. Alone. Unsure. Hopeless. But in faith, we can cry out for God to clean our hearts, renew a right spirit within us, and ask him to restore our joy in him, upholding us with a willing spirit.
That prayer, every day, is part of the restoration process.
No matter what we face, no matter what comes, God promises to clean, renew, restore, and uphold. Allow him to be on your healing team. Let God be an active participant in the restoration you are seeking right now. Together with God and your healing team, you’ll see a restoration of body, soul, mind, and spirit.
Do you need “Restore 2024”?
If so, I’m happy to share my rhyme with you.
Where do you need to see restoration? What comes to mind when you think of a healing team? What can you do today to start the process of building your healing team?
Jenilee is a certified professional life coach, a certified autism coach and an ordained minister, with over 20 years in career ministry. Serving in stateside churches and overseas work, Jenilee brings lived experience, problem solving skills, compassionate support and creativity into each coaching session. Jenilee asks the hard questions while listening, guiding and coaching clients in their unique life situation. With many in her immediate family on the autism spectrum, Jenilee has a special place in her heart for moms of kids on the spectrum and for wives going through the difficulties of spectrum marriage. Even more specifically, a passion for these women who are also in full time ministry or cross-cultural work. There are very few places to share the full story. In coaching with Jenilee, you can share every single page of the story. For fun, Jenilee loves reading, writing, coffee, going for walks, and watching history documentaries.
You can connect with Jenilee daily on Instagram @jenileerachel or through her website, jenileerachel.com.
One Response
I think a spiritual director could also be a great part of a healing team, especially around questions of faith and calling and where is God in all of this!