Shadow of the Almighty

We never fully recovered from our host-country bank account being hacked. We replaced the stolen phone that was used to gain access. We opened new accounts. But the money was gone. The thieves were never caught. It was a particular hardship that it came when our organization was struggling with funding for the third year in a row, and we had just received a transfer from our American bank to pay school fees for more than fifty sponsored students.

What followed was six months of one crisis after another. At times, it happened that as soon as one crisis was resolved, another would crop up on its heels. Other times, the crises overlapped. There were repairs to our water delivery truck that took it out of service for two months. We celebrated it being back on the road only to have it immediately back in the shop for an even more expensive repair. Meanwhile our family minivan was stolen from a restaurant parking lot. Seven weeks later, we finally had it back (found thanks to GPS, then repaired by the insurance company), and on the drive home, it was wrecked. It made it to our driveway that night and to the mechanic the next morning.

By the time the third or fourth crisis was resolved, I was really bracing myself. Is it safe to feel relief that this has been handled? Is it safe to celebrate that this particular trouble is past? What is the next thing that’s going to go horribly wrong?

I am not sure if this qualifies as suffering. In a world of violence, disease, and tragedies of many kinds, these seem more like inconveniences. Extremely inconvenient ones, yes, and stressful ones as well. If the apostle Paul could say he was pressed but not crushed, persecuted but not abandoned, then surely I could say I was stressed but not…what? Overwhelmed? Except I have been very much overwhelmed. It feels like suffering.

One of my sons said, “I thought God was protecting us, then this happened.” We talked about the fact that bad things happen even when God is watching over us, even when we’re doing what he wants us to do. We watched a Curiously Kaitlyn podcast episode called, “Why does God make sad things happen when he’s sad about them?” Although there is no clear answer to the question “why,” it is at least a little encouraging that practically everyone wonders.

The most encouraging idea was something I had read just before the bank-hacking incident. “When one is abiding under the shadow of the Almighty there will be no light, but that is only because God’s presence is so near.” I came back to these words again and again during those six months. They are from Corrie ten Boom’s book Tramp for the Lord. The book is a sequel to The Hiding Place, and it recounts Corrie’s travels after World War II. Most of the book shows God’s miraculous intervention in Corrie’s life and the way she walked by faith.

Chapter 8, “In the Power of the Spirit,” tells a different kind of story. Corrie didn’t know what God wanted her to do next. She wondered if God wasn’t communicating with her because she was too old and it was time to quit. Back in her hometown, she fell and was injured. Through weeks of physical recovery, through prayer and confession, she began to sense God’s presence again. She realized that he was drawing nearer even when she felt abandoned. It wasn’t time to retire, and she went from her recovery bed directly to a conference in Germany.

When I first read those words about being in the shadow of the Almighty, it spoke to me because of the three years of funding struggles. Like Corrie, I had wondered, “Does this situation mean that this ministry is ending?” Like Corrie, the answer is, “No; keep going.”

The imagery of the shadow of the Almighty is from Psalm 91. We are guaranteed to face hardship and to have troubles in this broken world. This psalm tells so many encouraging things that God does to protect “whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High,” such as rescuing them. I am full of questions during hardship. Where is that rescue? What does it look like? I don’t feel like I’m being rescued.

Psalm 91:15 says, “I will be with him in trouble.” I don’t know what my work is supposed to look like when it’s interrupted by so much trouble. I don’t know why we have faced so many back-to-back and overlapping crises in such a short period of time. But I can be sure that God is with us in all of our troubles. If I can’t see him or feel him or notice him, then I must be under his shadow.

What books or words have encouraged you during times of trouble? What Bible verses do you cling to?