I’ve traveled to many faraway lands, but always just for trips with home at the other end. But recently I find myself living in a strange land even though I’m still in the town that has been home for 38 years.
What turned my home town into a strange new land? The answer is both simple and sad. My lover, best friend, and soul mate went to our eternal home after fifty years of marriage. I tell myself it was time, he is now well and happy, we had a rich, full life filled with wonderful times.
My brain gets it, but my aching heart hasn’t caught up yet, so I wander around in this strange new land trying to get acclimated.
In this new place I only make half the bed. I buy a quart of milk rather than a half gallon, I pet the dog twice as much to fill in the missing petting from his master. I take out the garbage and gas up the car.
Different lands bring different customs as you all know. Some things are not different, however. I cling to my dear friends and I hope you seek out good friends wherever you are. I plan my days to stay active and get outside and mingle with others. Isolation would be easy, but not healthy. I strive to handle times alone but not be lonely. I read uplifting books and talk to God a lot.
If you’re married, Lord willing, you will face many more years with the men God placed you with. Cherish the time and make each day count. Make sure every day includes “I love you’s”. Eat by candlelight at least once a week. Put love notes in his lunch. Pick fresh flowers for the table. Fry his egg in a piece of bread with a heart cut out the middle. Hug a little tighter.
My husband and I had a 50 year love affair doing all these little things, leaving me with no regrets. I want to encourage you not to be one who looks back with “I should have…” If even one of you draws a little closer to your husband today, this bit of writing will not have been in vain.
I truly believe writing is healing, so putting these thoughts from my heart to yours has been therapeutic, a way for me to journey in the strange new land called grief.
Are you journeying in a strange land? How are you doing?