Want to know the irony of this post?
I was sick on Sunday. Well, it started Saturday evening with purging the contents of my stomach. To be repeated at 3 a.m., 4 a.m., 5 a.m., and 8 a.m. At which point I got up and laid on the couch for the remainder of the day (except for the times I had to scare the squirrel off the bird feeder and throw up again. #Priorities.)
Monday I felt weak, but returning to the land of the living. Thoughts turned to work and of this week’s theme and of the post I wanted to write about reviving. About how God is in the business of reviving. Reviving bodies, stories, history.
Just look at Hannah made fun of for infertility and how God met her in her sadness.
Just look at Moses who blew it when he killed the Egyptian and how God met him in the wilderness.
Just look at Mary and Martha who were so confused when Jesus didn’t show up and he not only could handle their anger and confusion, he could bring their brother back to life.
Just look at the woman who had bled for years and the ways God knew it wasn’t just her body that needed reviving, it was her spirit too.
Yes, our God is a God who revives. He brings back to life. He restores. He gives new life and energy.
Though I like to be instantly well from an illness, I was experiencing reviving.
I tend to see metaphors everywhere. There is always a lesson behind the ordinary. The common is laced with deeper meaning. Which is a lovely way to live until I wonder what God is doing in the living metaphor that is my life.
Tuesday I was the opposite of revived. I was weak, and foggy in the brain, and wondering what God wanted to show me about reviving . . . because I was either missing the lesson OR a bit off track on how He looks at reviving.
I sipped 7-up, the drink of the ill, no interest in food or energy to move.
{Maybe this is just for children of the 70s in America, but does anyone else associate 7-up or Sprite and illness? This is how I know I’m really sick: I sip 7-up.}
As I sipped, I wondered how much I have confused the way God looks at reviving with how America—my home culture—looks at prosperity. Revival looks like a graph with the line going up to the right. It might be a slow and steady incline, or it might go sharply up, but revival is always up. It’s the underdog winning. It’s the music crescendoing at the touching part of the movie. It’s the electricity being turned on at just the right moment.
Or is it?
What does revival look like when the visa doesn’t come through or the diagnosis is not good or the heat will not end, ever?
Or your children are not adjusting well. Or they are and you are not.
What does revival look like when the financial support is dwindling or the assignment that was perfect on paper is more like a nightmare in real life?
Or the husband you thought would be here . . . isn’t.
What then?
Maybe being revived can sometimes be straight and simple, like going on a walk and clearing our heads and souls, filling them up with Jesus. But maybe it can also be messy and complex, winding this way and that. Revived for the moment, on a level that doesn’t deny the reality we face but is not defined by it, and doesn’t remove the deep sadness or exhaustion.
I’m still waiting to feel better. To not wince at the smell of food. To not wander around trying to think a thought. But even in this state, Jesus has revival for me, and, you.
When have you experienced revival that might not have looked like revival?
Thank you for this, Amy!! I so often think of reviving in the way of things getting better- my prayer answered, my problems solved, energy in body and soul. I wonder if I’m missing the ways that God is trying to restore my soul even when my circumstances don’t feel restored.
And yes, Sprite/7-Up are for illness (or graduation reception punch). 🙂
Ha! ON graduation parties . . . so true. Maybe also wedding and baby showers? God has me thinking along these lines, how reviving does not have to go hand-in-hand with external situations (though it is fun when they do go hand-in-hand!)
I remember how horrified my language helper was to find me sipping 7-up when I was sick. I’ve learned many good Asian cures and comforts for various ailments, but I still want 7-up when I have a stomach thing. I just try to keep it a secret! 😉
I also “lie” about sleeping with the AC on 🙂 .. since it causes all illnesses :). (Except, that I think it would be far worse for me to not be able to sleep than to “risk” getting sick because I slept under AC). Here’s to the beauty of all cultures being right and wrong :)! Probably both have a piece of the big puzzle we call life.
Amy, THANK YOU! Your post deeply enoucrages me. If I wait for that sense of new life that makes me feel like Jesus and I are “going places”, accomplishing His breathtaking life-giving works, I miss it. Every day for the past 4 years has felt like I have been stuck in mud, spinning my wheels. If my experience of revival comes from “moving onward and upward” I lose my sense of who I am. Your words took me to this passage in 2 Cor 4:7+ – “But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body…(there is my revival!) Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” These days, revival for me is an ongoing, upward gaze in the midst of ‘mostly dead” , treasuring the Treasure, followed by a spark of faith—an inward inkling—that God is up to something glorious.” And I walk on….
Yes Corinne! Love those verses in 2 Corinthians. Yet inwardly being renewed day by day….So we fix our eyes on the eternal perspective. Sometimes so hard to do when life is difficult.
I think for me that my soul is renewed and refreshed by beauty – in nature, in art, in a lovely comfortable sitting room, in a cup of coffee with a longtime friend, in reading a well written book. This can happen when I look up and out from myself – away from the circumstances of the difficulty I find myself in at the moment and appreciate what is around me. Sometimes it is so hard to do when life is overwhelming.
When my husband was pastoring in the US, after a busy Sunday, we would sometimes take what we called a “mini vacation” and go for an hour walk on the beach. Watching the sun set just revived my soul to allow me to face the next week. Often in the car driving home, I would remark that it felt like we had lived two different days! Sometimes it’s hard to have “mini vacations” in the concrete jungle where we currently live. I am looking for new creative ways to revive my soul.
And Amy, yes 7-up and occasionally GingerAle (when I can find it), truly is the beverage of the ill!!
JulieB, it comforts me to read your comment — you are wise and I appreciate your thoughts!(and glad to also know that 7-up and Ginger Ale are comforts and flavors to more than just me :))
Corinne, “we do not lose heart” — such a good reminder from God that the measure of success or valuable may not look like success on the surface to me. And four years is a long time to feel stuck in the mud. A long time. I’m sorry and wish I could climb out the vehicle and give you a push :). But I come back to reviving may not always look like I think it will and I have much to learn about how God sees things :). Much love.
I really appreciate the honesty of this post. I’m still stuck in last week’s theme of Renewal, and feel like I could have a month of each of the Re: topics.
I keep thinking that I’ll be revived, recovered, renewed from the Holiday season, but in all honesty, I’m not. I’m having a hard time looking forward to Spring, after sitting through a meeting and seeing all that there is planned for the Spring. & Spring is my favorite time of year in my host country!
A different kind of revival is happening in our bedroom right now…as we are completely redoing it – storage space, bed, nightstands, etc. It’s a necessary thing to do, and I’m hoping that it will truly be an Oasis, instead of a junk-collecting spot. & where some may think that it’s frivolous to spend the money on it, I’m thankful for gifts that allow us to create this oasis!
Melissa, guess what, I’m back to not feeling so great (and I rarely get sick, so I am not sure what is going on!), but your comment strikes a chord with me. I keep thinking I’ll be revived physically, and I’m just not myself. I love spring, so I’ll be praying that as your bedroom is redone, you spirit will be revived and ready for spring. (I know that money can be a weird thing, but I am GLAD to hear you are able to redo your bedroom. Oasis sounds so much more “Kingdom of God” than a junk-collecting space :)!!!)
I am so grateful for Velvet Ashes. These stories of fellow Ms on the field or at home transitioning have really encouraged me these past two years. I also shared your link with some Asian M’s. Thank you so much. Yeah, I am also in reviving by returning to the US due to two herniated discs in my back that compressed my nerve root. You know its been painful, confusing, and difficult to accept this setback. I took a medical leave from my Asian university and returned home to also help my parents, who are dealing with serious health problems. Through this back problem, I have experienced such kindness from my Asian friends and doctors. God provided the funds, the meds, car rides to the hospital…He even used those times to show two of my unsaved friends His amazing provision and timing. Now at home, God provided my old doctor from ten years ago to accept me as an old patient and charge me at a cheaper rate even though I’ m currently uninsured. I am focusing on seeing God’s hand through all these things. He is always at work, and He’s on our side. It’s sometimes through these intense times where we become completely transparent with God, others, and ourselves. This is where we believe God is good and praise Him for who he is regardless of our present situation.
Two herniated disks, Karen?! Oh that sounds painful — both physically and emotionally to leave your university and local friends and return (for a while) to “home.” I’m thankful you can see and sense God’s provision in the midst of all you’ve got going on. And thank you for your kind words about Velvet Ashes and for sharing posts!